| PARENTSAre You a Confident Parent?By Jim BurnsAuthor, Confident Parenting
 CBN.com  
                If a parent’s goal is to raise his or hear  children into responsible adults – not just to make kids happy – it’s essential  to have a plan. But many moms and dads find themselves making it up as they go  along, with little consistency or purpose.  In Confident Parenting (Bethany House), national radio host Jim Burns  draws from his more than 20 years experience counseling hundreds of families to  help parents develop an effective strategy for raising healthy, whole children.  Confident parenting may sound like an  oxymoron, Burns admits. “I fluctuate between knowing the right stuff to do and  absolutely flying by the seat of my pants,’ says the father of three daughters.  But he shows readers that with perseverance and endurance, strategy, and  intentionality, they can create a grace-filled home. In his book, he offers these seven steps to parenting with confidence.  A confident parent perseveres  and will: 1.  Overcome Negative Family PatternsEven  if you grew up in a dysfunctional family, you can be the “transitional  generation.” You can break the chain of dysfunction from your past and help  your children move beyond negative family patterns.
 2.  Take Responsibility for Your Plan and PurposeIn  the days of Jesus, the Hebrews often followed a plan and a purpose for their  parenting right from Scripture. It was a blueprint for passing focus and  faithfulness from generation to generation. We have moved away from this plan  and it’s time to recapture it.
 3.  Communicate With Affection, Warmth, and EncouragementYou  can radically change the atmosphere in your home with affection, warmth, and  encouragement (A.W.E.). Too often we use shame-based parenting techniques  instead of A.W.E. It’s time we treated each other with grace and love.
 4.  Find Replenishment for Overcrowded LivesWhen  we are dangerously tired, it becomes far too easy to be distracted. We start to  feel numb to the full range of human emotion and make poor parenting and  relational mistakes. Good things do not always come through unceasing  activities and a heightened pace of life.
 5.  Create a Grace-Filled Home With Consistent DisciplineRules  without relationship will equal rebellion. We need to give our children clear  moral boundaries and enough grace to feel loved and secure.
 6.  Bring Security and Honor to the Home Through Parental BlessingsThe  best answer to a child’s longing for security and acceptance is to provide a  biblical sense of blessing. Even if we didn’t receive a God-honoring blessing  from our parents, we can bring security and acceptance to our children through  blessings and celebrating their rites of passage.
 7.  Raise Kids Who Love God and Have a Proper Love for ThemselvesWith  a parenting “map,” you can build a legacy of faith and love from generation to  generation.
 A  caller to my daily radio broadcast asked me if there were any guarantees that  her children would grow up without deep problems. I had to be honest—there are  none. In fact, some of the greatest parents I know have had moments of  heartache with their children. Even so-called experts in the field of parenting  and family have had their share of crash-and-burn experiences with their own  kids. However, with a plan and purpose, the risk factors are much improved in  your favor. This job called parenting is anything but easy. But there is no  higher calling on earth. So let’s together become more confident parents.   For more stories like this one, sign up to receive Family News from CBN.com in   your email every Friday.               
 Excerpted from: Confident Parenting by Jim Burns, 
Copyright © 2007; ISBN 9780764202070. 
Published by Bethany  House Publishers, used by permission. Unauthorized duplication  prohibited.   
 
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