RELATIONSHIPS
Love Extravagantly
By Marita Littauer with Chuck
Noon, MA, LPCC
Guest Columnist
CBN.com
-- When I was writing the chapter called Celebrate Your
Path, on the value of a mission statement, for my book You’ve
Got What It Takes I looked at my own life. I realized
that I had a defining statement or theme for my professional ventures,
but I did not have a personal one. I knew how valuable my professional
statements were so I could easily see the importance of a personal
one. I was recommending this to my readers, but I did not have
one myself. I mulled this over in my mind for several days. I
focused on the need for a personal purpose statement.
I had been attending a women's Bible study at my church on the
book of Ephesians and had been reading the chapter covered each
week in several different versions of the Bible. One night before
class I read Ephesians 5 in The Message.
As I read, God spoke to me through this verse as it seemed to
jump off the page and hit me in the face: "Observe how
Christ loved us. His love is not cautious but extravagant. He
didn't love in order to get something from us but to give everything
of himself to us. Love like that." I knew that my personal
mission statement is “Love Extravagantly;” to love
my husband with extravagance, not to get, but to give everything
of myself. As I cook breakfast or dinner, as I do the dishes,
as I do the laundry—all of these things are something of
myself I can give, not expecting to get in return. My husband
had been through a rough time. He had not been in a place to be
able to give much. But I was. I wrote that verse out on my mirror
in the bathroom to remind me of my mission.
Shortly after taking on this idea of loving extravagantly, I
had to put it to the test. Chuck has a large radio controlled
model airplane that has been a part of his life for over 30 years
– he started it when he was eight and finally finished it
twenty years later. We have painstakingly moved it from house
to house. He built it and has too much of himself invested in
it to risk flying it. With a five-foot wing span, you cannot just
tuck it any place. In our home at the time it hung up near the
peak of the cathedral ceiling in the family room—above my
desk. With its bright red with Red Baron like decals, it is always
noticed. Since it is important to Chuck, I have accepted it as
a conversation piece.
Around the time of this revelation, Chuck took it down to take
to a model airplane show. He spent hours cleaning off the accumulated
dust that had firmly attached itself to every surface. The plane
was very popular at the show and he discovered its value. Before
he put it back on its hook, he wanted to protect it. He covered
the body and wings with plastic dry cleaning bags, advertising
and all.
I like my home to look like a showplace; you can imagine that
even having the airplane there is an act of compromise and love.
Having it covered with baggy dry cleaning bags with black and
yellow words on them, went too far. Upon seeing the eyesore above
my desk, I wailed, "I'll never be able to entertain again!"
After my outburst, which I knew was an overreaction, I went outside
and trimmed my roses. As I took a deep breath, I heard God speak
two words into my head: "love extravagantly." Does it
really matter if the airplane has a bag over it? What is more
important, that my husband be happy or that I have a lovely home?
Humm… that was tough. After some thought, I came back in
and apologized—ready to accept the dry cleaning bags. Meanwhile,
he had decided that I was right and it really was ugly. He took
the plane down, removed the dry cleaning bags and was replacing
them with clear plastic wrap that clung tightly to every curve
and didn't even show!
This story is found in my book You’ve Got What It Takes,
and I include the story every time I speak on it. Repeatedly after
I share that story, people come up to me and tell me that “Love
Extravagantly” is what they needed to hear.
I remember the first time I shared it. I was speaking at a women’s
conference in Oregon. At the end of the day, a woman came up to
me said, “out of everything that has gone on here today,
Love Extravagantly is what I am taking home with me.” I
thanked her and smiled. I realized I had hit upon something that
wasn’t just important to me, it resonated with my audiences.
I shared the same message with a group of women in Phoenix. At
the end, an older woman came up to me and said, “What you
shared about Love Extravagantly was for me.” She explained
that her husband was terminally ill and she was his caretaker.
She needed to remember to Love Extravagantly.
As I have continued to speak on the message of my book You’ve
Got What It Takes, I have found the need for the Love Extravagantly
principle to be universal. What began as a small part of my previous
book, has grown into a message of its own. In the weeks and months
to come, here on CBN.com you will see how others have taken the
high road, not the easy road, to follow Christ’s example
in their marriage—not to get but to give, not cautious but
extravagant. From their examples you can apply the same ideas
to your own marriage and expect similar results. With all the
changes in today’s family structure, couples need something
more than just love to make their marriages work. They need to
Love Extravagantly!
 Marita
Littauer is the author of 13 books and is President of CLASServices
Inc. She can be reached through www.classervices.com.
Chuck Noon is a licensed professional counselor specializing
in marriage. Chuck is married to Marita Littauer. For more
information visit: www.chucknoon.com
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